He said: I don't know why you wear a bra; you've got nothing to put in it.
She said: You wear pants don't you?
He said, "Since I first met you, I have wanted to make love to you really badly."She said, "Well, you succeeded."
Him: "What do you think of this talk of scientists crossing a man with a pig?"
Her: "They're a little late!"
Q. How many men does it take to change a light bulb?
A. One. He just holds it up there and waits for the world to revolve around him.
I divorced my husband for religious reasons. He thought he was God...I didn't!
I still miss my ex-husband, but my aim is improving!
If you want to end relationships just say, "I want to marry you so we can live together forever." Sometimes they leave skid marks.
I'm happily married - but my wife isn't.
It's like magic. When you live by yourself, all your annoying habits are gone!
I just want revenge. Is that so wrong?
Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.
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