Free Laugh - Alimony

Alimony, a Latin term for removing a man's wallet through his genitals.

When two people decide to get a divorce, it isn't a sign that they don't understand one another, but a sign that they have, at last, begun to.

Marriage is grand and divorce is about 10 grand.

Marriage is not a word; it is a sentence.

"Mr. Smith, I have reviewed this case very carefully," the divorce court judge said, "and I've decided to give your wife $275 a week." "That's very fair, your honor," the husband said. "And every now and then I'll try to send her a few bucks myself."

Men marry women with the hope they will never change. Women marry men with the hope they will change. Invariably they are both disappointed.

When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.

I still miss my ex-wife....but my aim is getting better.